Navigating the Dating Scene

You’ve been making all the usual excuses….

“It isn’t the right time.” “I just seem to attract the wrong type of people.”

“There’s no one out there for me.” “All the good men are gay or already taken.”

“There must be something wrong with me.”

“Maybe, I’m better off alone, anyway.”

So, you want to give up, order takeout, and binge on Chinese and Netflix after going on a really lousy date?

But you might discover that you’re pushing everyone away.

You’re making excuses about why each guy will not work out –

When, deep inside, you’re worried that you’re going to end up alone.

After all, it’s easier to reject than to be rejected.

Ladies,

I know, I know. It’s soooooo hard…

It feels like everyone around you is off living their happily-ever-after.

Everyone – but you.

Love is in the air, except for the unlucky – or undeserving.

It would be very easy for me to say, “It’s ok; don’t worry…”

Or to tell you what my mother and grandmother used to tell me: “There is a cover for every pot.” And yes, there is truth to that statement…

And yes, you need to believe that it can and will happen.

However, the reality of starting a new relationship or ending an old one can be a tough adjustment.

Whether you are braving the storm after a divorce –

Or you’re feeling frustrated at all these non-committal dating apps that really function only as a ploy for hook-ups when you want a serious relationship – hopefully, one that results in marriage –

Stepping your toes into the hurricane of dating in the 21st century can be exhausting – even terrifying.

We all carry our baggage from our childhood and previous relationships.

And that baggage did not lead you on the path where you originally intended to go.

You’ve been hurt.

You’ve been lied to.

Perhaps you were betrayed – or abused.

You built a wall to protect yourself from being hurt like that again.

And your fortress has served you well… but you’ve become lonely in there all by yourself.

Don’t you think its time to tear down the wall?

Slowly. Brick by brick. Step by step. Therapy can bring you fresh air.

To a safe space where you can explore your past relationships.

Process and resolve your unresolved pain.

Clarify what you’re looking for in a relationship.

Re-define your priorities – what’s really important to make a relationship work?

Transcend merely external factors – attractive? An advantage? Yes. A necessity? Maybe, maybe not.

Working with a seasoned therapist will help you take a long look in the mirror.

Are you the partner you’d like to find for yourself? Would you like to be in a relationship with someone like yourself?

I’ll help you recognize your own self-sabotaging behaviors, replace them with new and better patterns, and break through fears of commitment and intimacy.

Together, we’ll find answers to two important questions:

What do you need to do to become the best version of yourself? How can you bring a new and more positive energy to the table?

Therapy is the place –

To address issues of self-esteem and bolster your self-confidence.

To learn how to listen to what your date is not saying and how to identify your particular red flags.

To develop tools for more effective dating communication – so you’ll have clarity about whether this date has the potential to rise to the next level.

To realize – at last – that you don’t have to “settle” or fall back into your old, dysfunctional patterns.

You’ll gain the skills you need to build lasting emotional intimacy.

The therapeutic relationship will allow you forge your unique pathway forward.

Reach out to me today (973) 798-8680.